Picture a leader — someone who inspires their team, crushes organizational goals, and wows shareholders. What does this person look like? Are they hyper-decisive? Zealous and driven? Tortured by their own genius?
You’d be forgiven if you’re picturing a man in a black turtleneck and headset mic. This is the image of leadership we’ve seen for decades. And the traits of our most visible leaders aren’t necessarily incorrect, but they are incomplete.
Sure, leaders need to be decisive. And they need to have a vision. But there is so much more that makes a good leader beyond a dogged pursuit of performance.
If you’re interested in thriving as a leader, here are four skills you’ll need beyond high performance — and what you can do to foster them.
1. Flexibility and adaptability
There’s a lot less currency in saying “what I say goes” these days than there was in the heyday of the tech leader-visionary. The working world has changed: There’s a bigger emphasis on inclusivity and different viewpoints — and rightly so. The world changes more quickly than it ever has, and agility is critical for success. Leaders who can’t adapt to new situations or demonstrate flexibility around an unpredictable world will get left behind.
How to develop flexibility and adaptability at work
If you’re having trouble riding the waves of uncertainty that mark the business world, try an exercise to help you understand what you can and cannot control. Make a list: You can control output quality; you can’t control global economic forces like recessions. You can control the generosity of benefits you extend to your team; you can’t control when your top performer has a personal crisis and has to take a leave. Then, focus on the areas you can manage and direct your efforts that way.
2. Vulnerability
It’s a tall order to motivate a team to follow a stoic robot issuing edicts from a corner office. To gain the trust of your team — a necessary step in being an effective leader — you’ll need to show your human side. Owning your authenticity as a person helps your team feel engaged, and they’ll see you model a version of the working world that acknowledges and honors the messy reality of being human beings in the workplace. It’s a way to create safety for your team.
How to develop vulnerability at work
Demonstrating vulnerability as a leader doesn’t mean crossing boundaries or sharing too much of your personal life. But you can take two key steps: Asking for help and setting boundaries. Asking for help means acknowledging your own imperfectness and recognizing the skills your teammates bring that make them indispensable. Setting boundaries — like turning off Slack during your kid’s birthday party — shows that you have a life outside of being their boss and that the entire team’s lives outside work are valuable. You’re not a machine, and they’ll respect you more as a human than a robot.
3. Curiosity
As a leader, you’re not expected to have all the answers. In fact, you’re much more likely to gain the trust and respect of your reports if you display a constant curiosity. So much of leading is about fact-finding and assembling as much information and as many points of view as possible before making an ultimate call. Curiosity is also a measure of both vulnerability and flexibility: It shows that you’re taking into account the expertise and experience of others.
How to develop curiosity at work
When developing your sense of curiosity, you can practice one key phrase: Tell me more about that. This can be your go-to when someone comes to you with an issue, feedback, or question. It’s an invitation for colleagues to share, signaling that you are interested in their point of view.
4. Empathic communication
So much of your work as a leader is about communicating ideas to your team, gaining their buy-in, and managing their doubts. Clear communication is critical, but you’ll also have to take it further and focus on empathy. Empathic communication is more than a simple relaying of facts and figures — it takes into account the human motivations of your team. It’s a way to acknowledge them as humans instead of worker bees.
How to develop empathic communication at work
A great way to add empathy to your communication style is to simply slow down. When a report comes to you with a problem, take a pause. What are they really telling you? Are they overworked? Under-resourced? Unsure of their own skills? At that point, validate what they’re feeling — their human emotions are a significant factor in their ability to perform. Then, focus on a collaborative approach: How can you help them? How can you ease their anxieties? How can you speak to them as a flawed, messy human who is simply trying their best?
